Carson's Corner | The Master Bought me a car!

Dear Scottie Friends,

What a report I have for you today. THE MASTER BOUGHT ME A CAR!

I am not even kidding. HE BOUGHT ME A CAR.

Well, it’s not exactly a car. In fact, he keeps saying “Don’t call it a car. It’s a Jeep.” Apparently there is more to this than a Scottie can exactly figure concerning vehicular transportation but we most definitely have a new means of getting where we want to go. It’s a very big, very shiny, very Jeepy Jeep.

And I just love it.

If you don’t know anything about Jeeps let me tell you: it’s the only car (whoops!) that is less aerodynamic than me. In fact if you take a Scottie’s muzzle and put four wheels on it you pretty much have the box that is a Jeep. It’s a brick on wheels. The Master says that’s okay because it wasn’t meant to go fast. It was meant to go fun.

And does it ever.

The Master had been watching a lot of TV with that whole Hoops Madness thing going on and there were commercials with people in these Jeeps doing Jeep things and looking like they were having a great time. Even more the Master had a friend who is all about Jeeps and he was telling him they are great. So the Master started talking Jeeps. He said “Hey, how about us getting a Jeep? We could be driving around in one of those with the top off and the doors off and that would be crazy fun.” Well, taking the doors off your car (whoops again) does seem kinda crazy, especially since I’m too small to wear a seat belt (something Dear Daughter 1 was quick to point out). The Master just laughed and said “I’ll get him a harness. I’m not letting the Car Dog fall out. It’ll be fun.”

And he was right.

Riding in a Jeep is more fun than falling into a barrel of carrots and having to eat your way out. The best thing about the car (whatever! you know what I mean, I’ll edit this later) is that IT DOES NOT HAVE A CEILING. Can you imagine? That’s what the Master meant by “take the top off.” There is no top at all. You’re just out there, you and the sun and the wind in your ears. It’s marvelous. I don’t even have to stick my head out the window to get that fresh-breeze-blown-about look. The other morning it was cold enough to make a Husky want a sweater but the Master said “we’re going with the top off to the office!” (because it was his first day to own it, I think). Down the freeway we went with the wind screaming through us and we both nearly froze and we loved it. Running the heater on full blast helped a little, but honestly I didn’t care. Wind. Sun. Air. Tunes blaring from the radio. Big outdoors above me. This Jeep thing is cool.

It’s also way up there. When you’re a Scottie you see most of the world from the stunning altitude of approximately eleven inches. That means I see a lot of ankles (some of you could be a little more diligent in the bathtub, believe me!) and most any grass or bush keeps me from seeing anything. Not to worry - my nose is supremely better than my eyes. But I do like being elevated so I can see better. This Jeep is up. I’m up. It’s so up I can barely put my front feet on the running board to get in (the Master gives me a boost and I’m good to go!). Then I can stick my head out the window and see everything. Yesterday I saw a guy walking his dog and I barked at that dog and said “Look at me, I’m way up here looking down on you because I’M IN CHARGE OF YOU AND EVERY OTHER DOG IN THE UNIVERSE AND MY MASTER BOUGHT ME A CAR, I MEAN A JEEP, SO THERE!”

It was a great moment. I really like this Jeep thing. And the Master does too. He said we’re gonna try the no doors business when it gets to be summer. I can hardly wait. But right now I think I’ll go get me a big nap so I’ll be rested for the ride home from work in my new Jeep!